The part where my blog ends up as my dream journal.. again.

You only have mere hours to record a good dream.  Otherwise it'll be gone for good.  That's my theory anyway.

Last night I dreamt..

I was competing in some sort of Grand Prix form of the Ultimate Fighting Championship (Cage Fighting to those not in the know).  A Grand Prix is essentially when fighters compete in multiple matches in a small period of time - either a night or a weekend.  These kind of tournaments do not allow time for injury recovery or training to adapt to the next fighter's style, it's simply the best on the day.  These kind of fights don't really exist in UFC any more as it's adapted a league style of tournament but if you watch the film "Warrior" you will see what kind of competition I'm referring to.

During this tournament I was getting pretty far, despite being absolutely terrified of having to compete, knowing that despite my years of training I'm vastly inferior to the majority of professional or even amateur fighters.  Hell if you walk into my class having never trained Muay Thai before, you're probably better than me.

In the smaller weight category though something extraordinary was happening - an eight year old boy was winning every match by decisive swift knock outs.  That was until he faced up against a ten year old in the final.  The ten year old however didn't fight him, he pulled out a childish game, one I remember from my childhood where you hold a hand over somebody's head and say a number, which was referring to the number of boyfriends the other person had.  The two boys then started acting not as fighters, but quite rightly - as kids.  The eight year old ran off to get a jumper because he was cold and the ten year old was declared the winner.  The eight year old wasn't angry or sad to lose, kind of just happy to be a kid again.

Turned out that in the dream the whole story was part of an audiobook collection written and performed by the prodigy, despite the fact I was seeing everything very visually.  I then looked on Amazon in the dream and found out that the story had rave reviews.

That's all for now folks.

Charlto answers an online application question

 Question 1: We like people that are interesting. What would you say is unique about you?

Well first off, I'm not going to answer this question by starting with "I am unique because..." I don't want to give you a starchy ego driven response to this listing off all of my greatest attributes, how I'm so intelligent, enthusiastic and goal orientated.  I'd rather illicit a response from you (whoever is reading this, whether that's plural or singular) that makes you say "Hey, I think I like this guy" because generally when most people meet me, they do.  I'm in the habit of treating complete strangers like friends after all a little bit of empathy can go a long way.  We're all human beings after all and we're all unique in our own way despite 99% of our genetic coding being exactly the same as the person beside us, in front of us or ten thousand miles away from us.  We all witness good times, bad times and everything in between.  I've experienced personal tragedy from being around a dying family member in his last days.  I've lay in bed with the person I loved probably just as much as anybody likely to read this.  I could tell you about my hobbies - how I love martial arts like Brazillian Jiu Jitsu and Muay Thai, playing obscure card games and arguing with racists on youtube videos.  I could tell you about my charity work, teaching asylum seekers English and helping out with ecological concerns in a stretch of countryside that runs through my own city but its all part of a bigger picture.

 As you may be beginning to see, I'm a little eccentric.  One good pal who I lived with for a few years stated "The thing I like about you Conor is that you don't do anything overly eccentric it's just that every little action, every behavioural quirk you exhibit is just a little bit eccentric in it's own right".  I stand out from the crowd because I'm not afraid to.  Allow me to give an example. A few months after I graduated, back in 2009 I attended an open interview day at a graduate sales recruitment agency, the boss asked the attendees to one by one, stand declare their name, their star sign and their greatest achievement to date.  I stood and delivered the following quip "I'm Conor and I'm an alcoholic.  Oh sorry.. wrong room!"  Immediately the room erupted into laughter and that's exactly what I sought.  Nothing fills me with a greater enjoyment than knowing I can cause a whole crowd of strangers to laugh because as soon as you do, everyone can relax a little and start remembering that we are just humans and that we don't have to put ourselves on some pedestal to be judged.  We can do our best but worrying about whether our best is ever good enough only increases our chance of having an early heart attack and I intend to make it through my forties at least.

February Reviews

It's been a while since I've had time to sit down and churn out some reviews.. or rather I've been watching far too much crap to spend the time writing about what I see.  Excuses aside, here's a break done of some of the TV shows that have been emerging in the states over the last month or so.

Sitcoms

 

I got introduced to the extremely offensive Australian comic Jim Jefferies just before Christmas.  His stand up is arguably inspirational in its crass but beautifully crafted manner.  His routine is storydriven, layered with awkward pauses, intejectory comments and sickening crudeness and he displays his abilities on stage to such an extent that I would count him as one one of the top ten stand up comedians performing today.  However this new venture, where he plays a charicature of himself isn't quite on par with his stand up routines.  This is partly due to his realiance on those stories he has already told in said routines.  Some of these work brilliantly, namely in the first episode where he brings his severely disabled friend (played by the nerdy guy in American Pie-like teen comedy Roadtrip) to a brothel to receive his first blowjob.  It's a story that I feel wasn't concocted by Jefferies but one I genuinely think he lived through, making the whole event picture perfect for a comedy seeking audience and it's recreation on screen gives the viewer the most perfect feel-good comedy experience.  Others don't quite hold up to these fables on stage, the retellings been forced into awkward situations ensuring that for the viewer they can feel somewhat misplaced: urinals and park benches, the latter place has Hughes declaring after one story "it's alot better on stage". 

The show has a fair  bit in common with American comedian Louis C.K.'s show, "Louie".  Both are semi-autobiographical and both rely on the wit of the starring comedians to fuel the shows' scripts.  In comparison though, Legit feels a little bit stale to those familiar with him.  The jokes that aren't taken from his stand up feel too obvious already - centering on him being a young, obnoxious Australian man dropped into a pond of American civility and seriousness.  Louis on the other hand is a little bit more subtle and surreal, we aren't laughing at C.K.'s obnoxiousness, rather his hopelessness.  The live audience sections show us that C.K. is far from running out of things to say about society or his place as a balding, overweight forty something year old within it.  It's his nervousness and haplessness in a hostile environment that generates a comfortable awkwardness that we empathize with the writer/main character.  For these reasons, it's understandable how C.K.'s critically acclaimed show has made it into its third season.  I can't quite say the same thing about Legit.  Whilst there is hope yet and without doubt the first two episodes have provided me with some of the most euphoric feel good moments a sitcom could, the comedy has largely wavered in episodes 4-6.  They haven't been entirely laughless but I don't see the show making enough waves to warrant much more of the same thing.  Legit is unlikely to gather the same cult following as another recent Australian/American collaboration, "Wilfred" has. 

Action/Drama

It's a few months away before HBO's and AMC's big guns come back on US television screen's/laptops everywhere of every telly addict, ever.  Whilst we wait for our Breaking Bad/Game of Thrones/Boardwalk Empires, we've got a little bit of things to enjoy in between.  Perhaps I should start chasing after the subtitled Danish thrillers after shows like "The Killing" and "The Bridge" made a big splash with more experienced reviewers but I've opted for the lazy man's route: look for something forgetable and American.  On the top of that list is Banshee.  Brought to you by the maker of Twilight-for-adults "True Blood".  I have to admit, I despise True Blood.  It's not that it's written extremely badly because I do humour the concepts of the supernatural forces playing out in a more realistic world.  I don't think it's that bad in terms of intrigue and suspense either.  I just hate every damn character on the entire show.  I would quite happily tie every one of them up around a big wooden stake and shove cotton wool in their mouths.  I don't want to see them die, I just can't bare to listen to them for any longer than I have.  For this reason, I'm surprised to enjoy Banshee, which takes on the similar stylish cinematography as its supernatural sister.  If Banshee had been realeased when I was fourteen on Channel 5, I would have waited for my parents to go to sleep and sneak downstairs to watch it every single night.  It has everything that a growing boy needs: a stereotypically badass male protagonist, vicious amounts of violence, blood and brutality and most of all a softcore porn level of sex and nudity.  Forget watching reruns of "Red Shoe Diaries" and "Compromising Situations" (who does that anyway), this is the show you were crying out for when you were sprouting pubes for the first time.  Taking place in the fictional midwest town of Banshee, ex-con sees New Zealand born actor Antony Starr stars as an unnamed protagonist who after being released from prison,  flees from his vicious Eastern European gangster nemisis, Rabbit to locate his former lover and partner in crime and the diamonds that they stole.  When it turns out that she is now married and  the diamonds are gone, he goes to the town's saloon, witnesses the brutal murder of the new town sheriff and decides to assume his identity, allowing him to act as an edgy "play by his own rules" cop. 

If you were ever a fan of the 1980s hit movie "Roadhouse", you're probably going to be a fan of Banshee.  Parallels between the two are easily drawn: both feature lawless towns in the pocket of sophisticated villain who are not just money making sophisticated schemers, but violent, sexualized psychopaths, both feature bold, martial arts practicing protagonists who aren't afraid to kick a man in the back of the knees and lastly both feature sex scenes with attractive big titted women (Lili Simmons has a lovely body on her).  Like Roadhouse, Banshee is primarily an action driven viewing.  Although its not quite as monster of the week as the similiar albeit softer superhero show, "Arrow".  It's fairly obvious how the ongoing storylines with the multiple villains and multiple love interests are going to develop. 

It will never be heralded for its intelligence and the number of wide open plotholes present probably urged HBO execs to pass the show on to the smaller sister network of Cinemax.  That's not to say we won't be seeing Banshee on our torrents list for quite some time.  Only half a season through and Banshee has already been renewed for another ten episode season.  Likely to be viewed by the same people who watch the tedious "Sons of Anarchy", this fun, fast paced romp of a series will attract its own crowd for its energy and slickness.