Monday was a whole other kettle of fish compared to most days in Copenhagen so far. It was potentially one of the worst days I've seen in the city weather wise. So the saying goes - it never rains, but it pours.

It made getting around the town a little harder to do, so my Mother and I were constantly having to rush from place to place with a cheap umbrella over our head, darting from cafe, to shop to closed museum to closed museum.

That's one of the few problems with Copenhagen. There's not that much to do on a Monday, other than maybe shops and cinema. When your art loving mother comes over, you want to show you've grown and matured into your years as both a student and a human being. She listed a number of places she wanted to go to and so I did my best to take her round some of them. One of them was Christiania, the former hippy commune, I've undoubtedly talked about before. When she first suggested it, I warned her of the nature of its excess - the first thing that hits you is the sweet, sweet smell of hashish. I told her she probably didn't want to go there, that's where I met my Danish friends.

"Ah, are they drug takers?"

I nodded and gave this awkward smirk. "Sometimes."

"Are you a drug taker?"

Caught off guard, I froze in silence for a fleeting moment. "That depends on what you mean by drug taker. I suppose I am though." At any other point in time, I probably would have laughed at the phrase "drug taker", due to how outdated and inaccurate it actually sounds, this point though, I couldn't.

I can't remember my mother's facial expression at this point. I felt a minor adrenaline rush, as if I was an animal backed up against a wall, unable to escape. I don't even think her reaction was that bad either.

"Really. What drugs do you take?" likewise, I don't remember her tone. It was somewhere between curious and disappointed.

"Oh you know, smoke a little weed here and there.. but I've tried other stuff."

"Like what?"

At this point, I listed the other types, that I've tried (I don't make any habit of anything). I'm not going to list them here because its incriminating evidence, I've done enough by admitting that I smoke weed. Not that I'm a-feared of cops banging on my door, because that's entirely unlikely - I neither deal, grow, produce or supply any thing to/for anybody which is who they'd come after, but things like this may come back to bite me in the ass. At one point in my life, I considered joining the military (read the earlier post where I mention the OTC) and whilst I don't think I will, its better not to rule things out. Similarly, I know in twenty years time, if I ever wanted to run for political office, people would probably care less about what I've done/may do in my "wild student years". I know that if I ever want to make bar (unlikely, but I'm not known for my firm decisions in life, I might turn around five years later and decide I want to be a lawyer or some such), they'll only take into account whether I have prior criminal convictions. My fear would be companies who may scope out exactly who I am before they hire me. They may decide because of what I've taken they'll rule me out in favour of a less qualified yet more willing to obey the law type. With them, I can't pretend I am some crack pot bullshitter, or even that I wrote the entries in moments of temporary insanity because that would be painting me as at least a little unstable.

Her reaction to the list was initially of complete shock and concern. She talked about what it might be cut with and I talked her around to the "drug taker's logic", about how I understand what I'm doing, I look into it before hand before I take it and I don't take anything that's likely to be mixed with rat poison or heroin (or coke/crystal meth, anything like that I have never tried and never will), things I have taken to be niche drugs; not generally in high demand, so they'll just be weaker variants rather than watered down. It'd be bad economics to mix them with rat poison.

Later on though, we stopped by my house to pick up a couple of jumpers so that we could endure the sharp chill better as we walked around the harbour area. I didn't want her to come into my room, insisting that it was too untidy for her to see. She persisted and after realizing it wasn't that untidy went and looked for what I was attempting and failing to conceal - a desk loosely covered in grains of tobacco and grass.

"That's what you were hiding. That looks recent. How often do you smoke?"

"About twice a week." At this point, it was a half-truth. It would be about twice a week, if I didn't see that much of my Danish friends. Like I say - good company, bad influence. But I was honest about a few things, I'm intending to stop soon, or at least cut down severely. This is down to two reasons. One; it's going to get harder to acquire once Gordon likesitinthe-Brown gets it moved up to a class B drug because he's an idiot who likes to divert people's attention from things that actually matter, and a number of other reasons which may or may not be related to:
Physical and mental health
Lethargy/motivation
The appeal
Money

I've basically edited this bit down because it's border-line whiney, the summary is if you keep doing something too much, no matter what it is, sooner or later, it'll catch up with you.

But back to my Mum's reaction. Overall, it wasn't as bad as expected. I think she doesn't judge or worry as much as I believed she might. She'll always worry of course, that's what she does as a mother (if your mother stops worrying about you, I'd grow concerned). There's no escaping that fact, but I don't think I've changed in her eyes. I'm still her little boy and she still trusts me like she always did. She didn't yell me down, or even give me the classic "I'm not angry, I'm just disappointed" line. I was really relieved to have gotten it off my chest.

Her reaction is something I would like all non-drug takers to consider
That's exactly how I hope I'm treated by people who read this, a shade of understanding - instead of a weak and incredibly shallow "You take drugs, I don't want to have anything to do with you" response, judge people by their character. Not their habits.

Similarly those who take drugs, shouldn't be thinking "Oh, they're not cool; they don't want to take stuff with us." I mean, I was guilty of thinking that from time-to-time when I was younger, but like I say, I'm friends with everyone.

A friend of mine on the bus heard a girl ask her friend if they were going to my leaving do. Her answer was "No, they're all drug addicts in that house."

At first, all of us who heard this story laughed. Drug addicts tend to be those who take addictive and dangerous substances and depend on, doing anything in their way to get their hands on the drug to keep them going. Apart from de 'erb and beer, there's nothing I do day to day, or on a week to week basis.

Whilst I really shouldn't care what some people think, reputation sticks and misinformed judging hinders what people think.

I gave up drinking for lent, drinking only four times in the space of those forty odd days. I'd be surprised if she could have done the same.

Anyway.. enough critisizing people, that's not what this is all about. I'm far from perfect myself.

So, back to the Copenhagen situation..

What the fuck is Denmark's obsession with Australians..
First of all, they have two really cheesy soaps shown during the day time. And yes, I mean cheesy. As in, they're akin to BBC's doctors, meets Home in Away. Mercy Beach or something..

Then you have "STARS", a fifteen minute show about movie stars, voiced by this whiney nasal Aussie guy talking about Julia Robert's screen "dayboo". It's pronounced like a french word, day-beau, you kangaroo molesting fuck (sorry Jake, you know I love your kind really, but you'd hate this guy's voice as well)

The show makes me beg two questions though:
A) Who gives a shit about Marcia Gay Harden?

B) Why doesn't Orlando Bloom get an acting coach?

Then you have Miami beach patrol. It may not have anything to do with Australia, but it is about as pointless as the other few. Now, COPS can be quite entertaining, but that Miami beach thing is just irritating. They spent about four hours catching some lobster poacher who shot one with a spear gun.

Seriously, there were about four police officers surrounding him and making sure he didn't run off. I may respect that important endangered species like elephants and tigers need protecting from poachers... but this was a lobster and not even any special kind of lobster, just a regular boil it and eat it kind.. So they confiscate all his shit and arrest him and find the evidence that they need to ensure he was guilty of the heinous crime. I'm sure somebody must have been thinking "should you not be out solving real problems?". The worst bit was when somebody went "I'm going to have to keep this lobster as evidence." Seriously. What a fucking dick? If he'd been smart he could have cooked it whilst it was still fresh. As that irritating robot from the Power Rangers once uttered: Ay yai yai!

On an unrelated note, does anyone else have a thing for that red headed girl in Mythbusters?

Back to real life, I got offered a few jobs here. Just after I had booked my flight. Its a shame; I would have liked to have stayed on a little longer, but on the other hand, I'm looking forward to coming home immensely. Missing the place and the people since I only got back for ten days at Easter.

On the women front,

Here is a short list of bullshit reasons why I didn't get any this week (or for that matter the last two months) that include:
Losing two days due to my mother being around
Cute Scottish girls who I -might- (Marc seemed to think so) have had a chance with going back to Glasgow earlier than anticipated
Being too high
Being too drunk
Not being drunk on other occasions (for instance this female friend of a Danish friend was this brunette with pretty blue eyes who was into me, but felt awkward because I was too sober)
Not bothering to call/e-mail some girls I had the number/e-mail of
Not getting replies from some of the girls I did have a number/e-mail of
Over thinking things before approaching - e.g. "what if she wants a relationship?" "what if she has a boyfriend?" "what do I say/do/think if this pops up, or this happens" "what if x/y/z are three lines with correlation on a graph.."
Trying too hard
Not trying hard enough
I'm too nice and gentle around nice girls
Not wanting to seem too desperate (a very difficult thing to do at this point in time)
Passing up opportunities to go swimming with hot Swedish girls because I thought I had other plans (this is the worst one. I can sort of understand the mindset I was in at the time, but at the end of the day it still adds up to one conclusion - I'm a fucking idiot!)

I had some other introspections on this situation (previously written down in the blog, but later removed), but the bottom line is - I'm not really that bothered. I've got work to do and beers to drink, along with a radiator that keeps giving me static shocks just by touching it. I can't let my nuts run my life, I'm not a fourteen year old with chronic masturbation syndrome any more.

I did promise one other thing last time, so here's the beer review. This final section is a little shoddy, so skip down if you're unable to give a shit.
Danish Beer Reviews

Now, I don't know how qualified I am to review beers, because lets face it - there are only a few occasions I am able to recall the actual flavour of the beer. Usually, like all good beer drinkers, I have a number of beers greater than four. At this point one's taste buds are often dulled or dumbed down a little so that all lagers taste pretty much the same.

When it comes to Danish beers though, many of them taste quite similar anyway, so you have to use your keen sense of smell and taste to work out what they're like before you enter drunk mode.

Here's a list though, of the ones I can remember. I'll begin with a list of Carlsberg brewed beers:

Carl's Special - This one isn't bad, a little bit bitter but drinkable
Carl's Ale - I've never been a big ale man myself and I don't think Carl's Ale is any exception. Its swiggable, but its not too good to sip on, there's a bit of a mad aftertaste
Carl's Hvede- I either haven't drank this, or I cannot remember
Jacobsen's Special - The Jacobsen's brew house only opened a few years ago, but the beers are brewed in an old style. Most of them taste quite nice, aged but with a chocolate style flavour
Carlsberg Pilsner - This is the standard carlsberg beer in Denmark. It tastes awesome in comparison to the 3.8% stuff brewed in England. When I drink a beer, I want beer. Not water. This has flavour, a bit of a kick and its nice. I wish they served this on tap in England instead of its womenly variety
Carlsberg Elephant Beer - You don't tend to drink 7.5% beers for their flavour, but even this one isn't too bad
Carlsberg Sport - Not actually a beer and is in fact a gatorade meets mountain dew style soft drink

Yes, I understand you're surprised that Carlsberg make so many. In fact, they make more, just these are the ones I actually vaguely remember drinking/coming across.

Tuborg - Tuborg is another Danish brand owned by Carlsberg. Danish people often attest that there is no difference between the two, but if I could take the pepsi challenge between Tuborg and Carlsberg and I reckon I could tell the difference. Tuborg is a much better beer. Unobtrusive to the taste
Tuborg Classic - Classic is for those days you don't fancy regular tuborg. It smells horrific, but it tastes pretty good.

Royal - Just ignore it. It's not bad, but its horrifically over priced for what it is. Its damn weird.

Faxe - Available in litre cans sold in Asda for £1.87 making them great for novelty value. I just can't seem to get a glass of the stuff, but I'm tempted to go down to the Faxe brewery on a day off and get sozzled. Problem is it takes about two hours to get there. It's almost not worth it.

King - Good cheap bottled Pilsner, available from the philosophy bar at the university, where you can also find the secret "medicine of philosophy" room. A room without even a conventional door handle.. Ooh the mystries

Odin's Pilsner - This will become your favourite at 25 p + 10 pant (bottle tax, that you reclaim when you recycle), you get a tasty, refreshing pilsner. It tastes quite watery, but it also gets you hammered if you drink eight or nine of them. Sorry, I don't see the problem with that.. do you?

Odin's is named after a God because for what it is, it was made by a God.

Keep the comments coming guys. I love them all, positive and negative. Though if anyone can relate to anything here, you have to tell me.. that's what I appreciate the most.

Conor